I am a pushover pedestrian. It's not something I am proud of, but it's the truth. I walk a lot, and on my foot-based travels, I often encounter other people who are also walking and more often than not, in the opposite direction of me. This of course leads to certain... "encounters" of a most unpleasant (for me, that is) variety. See, I am a simple, rural man who has been raised according to some old-fashioned principles commonly referred to as "common courtesy". These principles state that I, when out walking, meet another person walking in my general direction, I take a step or two to my right-hand side to allow this person to pass me with a certain ease.
Of course, these principles are based on the idea that this person also does this (takes a step or two to his or her right-hand side), thus creating a comfortable amount of passageway and much needed personal space between us. It's an old-fashioned idea, I know, but I feel it's a good one.
Unfortunately, this ancient knowledge of pedestrian courtesy seems to have faded into oblivion. I regularily get pushed aside, elbowed, bumped into or shouldered by men, women, little old ladies and seven year-olds. Being a man of principle, I continue to uphold the glorious ideals I have such belief in, but alas, my faith is being tested everyday. For years, I have stepped aside into snow, mud, puddles of water, dog-droppings and slush just to have the other person give me a good bump as they refuse to take similar action when we meet.
So, I see no other solution than to give all you selfish, brutal jay-walkers a good, solid smite. In particular, I'd like to reserve a special über-smite for the guy who nearly pushed me into a passing semi-trailer yesterday. Yes, the massive amounts of snow has reduced our already small sidewalks to nothing, but you COULD have taken that small step to the side so that I would have had a 30 cm clearing of the motorized death-machine that brushed beside me instead of the nerve-inducing 5 cms. Also, a good smiting is in order for the officials of this silly little town who seem to think that cars are more important than people. Ka-shmack!
Thank you for your attention,
Bit - brutalized pedestrian
PS! I'm thinking of establishing a "Pushover Pedestrians Association" (PPA) for other abused pedestrians like me, please get in touch if you feel this is of interest to you.
Of course, these principles are based on the idea that this person also does this (takes a step or two to his or her right-hand side), thus creating a comfortable amount of passageway and much needed personal space between us. It's an old-fashioned idea, I know, but I feel it's a good one.
Unfortunately, this ancient knowledge of pedestrian courtesy seems to have faded into oblivion. I regularily get pushed aside, elbowed, bumped into or shouldered by men, women, little old ladies and seven year-olds. Being a man of principle, I continue to uphold the glorious ideals I have such belief in, but alas, my faith is being tested everyday. For years, I have stepped aside into snow, mud, puddles of water, dog-droppings and slush just to have the other person give me a good bump as they refuse to take similar action when we meet.
So, I see no other solution than to give all you selfish, brutal jay-walkers a good, solid smite. In particular, I'd like to reserve a special über-smite for the guy who nearly pushed me into a passing semi-trailer yesterday. Yes, the massive amounts of snow has reduced our already small sidewalks to nothing, but you COULD have taken that small step to the side so that I would have had a 30 cm clearing of the motorized death-machine that brushed beside me instead of the nerve-inducing 5 cms. Also, a good smiting is in order for the officials of this silly little town who seem to think that cars are more important than people. Ka-shmack!
Thank you for your attention,
Bit - brutalized pedestrian
PS! I'm thinking of establishing a "Pushover Pedestrians Association" (PPA) for other abused pedestrians like me, please get in touch if you feel this is of interest to you.
posted by Arne S. at 12:52
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