Today, I present a unified smite to the creators and posters of this blog for not smiting nearly as much as they should. Smite thee, lazy smiters!

*smack* Ouch!

Smite thee, silly hackers! I'd very much like to call you by some very nasty names, since you've seen it fit to hack one of my websites on my frickin' birthday, but I prefer to give you a long list of Shakespearian insults instead. Here goes: *draws breath*

Thou weedy clapper-clawed fustilarian!
Thou mewling full-gorged malt-worm!
Thou frothy earth-vexing skainsmate!
Thou elvish-mark'd, abortive, rooting hog!
Thou ruttish toad-spotted whey-face!
Thou fawning pox-marked clotpole!
Thou wimpled fool-born devil-mon!
Thou odiferous doghearted mammet!
Thou cullionly sheep-biting gudgeon!
Thou jarring pox-marked coxcomb!
Thou paunchy milk-livered pigeon-egg!
Thou surly crook-pated foot-licker!
Thou impertinent bat-fowling measle!
Thou mammering lily-livered bladder!
Thou qualling pottle-deep coxcomb!
Thou droning ill-breeding hugger-mugger!
Thou surly guts-griping flap-dragon!
Thou warped flap-mouthed scut!
Thou mangled dizzy-eyed apple-john!
Thou dankish malmsey-nosed varlot!

Phew, I feel a little better now.